Disparity...

2 days from today would be my first ever paper presentation at an international conference...i should be excited...if not excited, nervous atleast...but my mind is not even visiting the thoughts 'bout the conference...its stuck....stuck at something i wont get even if i keep yearning for it for an entire lifetime...the piano at school...i can actually write a memory book on it...i still vividly remember how happy i was when Sister Marita had caught me meddling with the keys of the piano and attempting Hindustani Classical over it...in a "bunked class"...and after a long lecture on how advanced my move of bunking class in class VI was (and so how desperately i needed to rush to the confession box to get over with this sin of mine)...she had finally agreed to teach me to play it...
15 years...gosh..after 15 years its touch still felt the same...it was difficult but i could fight back that lump in the throat...when i felt that wood again...plethora of emotions I'd say...i actually thank u Almighty....that it was locked and the keys weren't available...it would have been very very difficult for me to stay composed once the music would have struck out...
i wish i could get that piano home...i wish i could relive all the beautiful ...beautiful memories it gifted me...
coz these instruments have given me far beyond what i could ever expect from the lifeless, i have personified them...drifting back to the notion of disparity... now who'll throw light over the faulty design of human psyche where the mind & the brain don't go hand in hand